::Honesty And Trust::
Are really hard to come by these days! Seems like everyone can't wait to stab another in the back., Talk shit about them soon as they turn their back, or just plain old lie to you!
So really what is honesty?
Are you being honest with someone if you *just don't tell them something they SHOULD know* because they are already in a bad mood that day, and you don't want to add to it?
Are you being honest with someone if you tell them something that you bought is for someone else when you get it but yet that person *conviently* never takes it, so BAM Your out 40 bucks?
Can you trust someone who puts off paying their bills to buy things that THEY ABSOLUTELY CAN'T AFFORD AT THE MOMENT? But yet they DON'T stop!
I have lived with people who lie, cheat and do whatever they want as long as it makes THEM happy! And over the years, I have found it really hard to trust people. So when you find someone you totally and completely trust and then BAM all the sudden they start giving you little reasons not to trust them. What do you do? Continue to trust that person?
Move on and find a way to gain that trust back? But how?
Or do you just cut your losses and realize that some people never change?
The one thing I hate more than anything in life is LIARS!!
I refuse to associate with people that blatenly lie, I refuse to be around people that I have caught lieing to me over and over again.
I also really hate it when you know for a fact what the person said or did was dishonest, yet they have an excuse for why they did it? Then you say something to them and they get all defensive, Why get all defensive like that if you honestly believe what you did or said was honest?
Do you stay mad or just *get over it*?
Really how do you gain someone's trust back once you have made them NOT trust you again?
So really what is honesty?
Are you being honest with someone if you *just don't tell them something they SHOULD know* because they are already in a bad mood that day, and you don't want to add to it?
Are you being honest with someone if you tell them something that you bought is for someone else when you get it but yet that person *conviently* never takes it, so BAM Your out 40 bucks?
Can you trust someone who puts off paying their bills to buy things that THEY ABSOLUTELY CAN'T AFFORD AT THE MOMENT? But yet they DON'T stop!
I have lived with people who lie, cheat and do whatever they want as long as it makes THEM happy! And over the years, I have found it really hard to trust people. So when you find someone you totally and completely trust and then BAM all the sudden they start giving you little reasons not to trust them. What do you do? Continue to trust that person?
Move on and find a way to gain that trust back? But how?
Or do you just cut your losses and realize that some people never change?
The one thing I hate more than anything in life is LIARS!!
I refuse to associate with people that blatenly lie, I refuse to be around people that I have caught lieing to me over and over again.
I also really hate it when you know for a fact what the person said or did was dishonest, yet they have an excuse for why they did it? Then you say something to them and they get all defensive, Why get all defensive like that if you honestly believe what you did or said was honest?
Do you stay mad or just *get over it*?
Really how do you gain someone's trust back once you have made them NOT trust you again?
posted by ::Ali:: at
11:03 AM
5 Comments:
Oh and for the record, I am NOT the one that needs the forgiving..LOL Even though that post may sound like it, I am the one that I feel was lied to.
It's very hard to let it go when someone has lied to you. Sailor quit smoking about 2 1/2 years ago and then started back right away. But he never told me he started back. I would smell smoke and ask him and he'd lie. I'd find receipts, and he'd get defensive and accuse me of digging through his stuff or he'd make up a rediculous excuse. It finally came out and I had actual proof, and it totally blew up. I almost left him over it. It was awful. I finally forgave him because it wasn't worth losing our marriage over, but now that he's quit again, it's so hard to forget that whole ordeal and believe him. It's not about the smoking, it's about the lying, and I just can't handle being lied to. I guess the reason he lied is because he felt like he failed and he felt weak for giving in and didn't really want to face that.
I am no good at advice. I hate when ppl lie to me to. I guess it all depends on the person and how big the lie is for me to forgive them and work at trying to gain my trust again. I wish I could be of more help.
Well, geez, that's a toughie, Ali . . . I'm not one to forgive lying easily at all. I guess in the end, it all comes down to weighing how much you care for this person (if you want to keep him/her still in your life) and what it was that you were lied to about. Like Blue's example, I'd have to find a way to work past a smoking issue, especially if it's a husband that you've built a marriage on . . . however, infadelity and money - those are much harder, especially if the person who lied can't own up to their mistake. I'm sorry you're having to go through this. It always sucks bad when you feel betrayed, no matter who did it.
I actually don't really know what to say to this Ali. But we have talked and you know I am on your side and hear for ya!
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