Sunday, March 05, 2006

Um, Can we say LAME?

OMG!! Never again am I gonna waste a chance at a sitter for sitting on my ass doing what I can do with them in bed!!
And that is just what we did! I am so bummed!!
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He finally got back from his Moms about 2 or 3ish yesterday afternoon, We had to head out to H&R Block to turn in all B's W2's he has collected(We are doing our taxes for 02,03,04,05) He never did those.. DUMBY! But with my mom working there it is completely free so there is no reason not to get caught up! So far we have 04 and 05 done with about 4,000 going towards the student loan!! We don't have to be there, she can just give the rest of it to my Mom when she is done! So we got that done!! I have been naggin for years of course for him to do them and he just didn't give a fuck! Sad but reality!! =(

So then we headed to my brothers that is about 10 minutes from the tax place!
We ordered dinner, watched that 70s show and bullshitted for a bit and left!
Thats it !!
Came home I made a drink and we TRIED to watch Walk the Line but the cd didnt work so we have to take it back to blockbuster and get a diff. one.. That really blew it was just starting to get good too..lol So we watched the end of Boogeyman and Hustle and Flow.. Great movies.. I wish they would of used the alternate ending on The Boogeyman, that was WAYY better than the one they did use..LOL
I had 3 drinks and he was asleep on the floor before 11:30, So I watched one skit from SNL and went to bed, sad and crying!
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On the relationship front......
I bathed, shaved, fixed my self all up for a nice night hoping to have some romance.. But instead I put on my nightgown and went to bed alone again while he layed on the livingroom floor snoring away! Ofcourse I wanted to have a few drinks so I did not get any nyquil so since I only had 3 drinks I did not have a buzz so I could n't sleep and had nightmares etc... Just miserable!

So just as I said was gonna happen, he is just acting like a few weeks ago didn't happen, Like I never found a SHITLOAD of porn magz and photos torn from other magz under my motherfucking bathroom sink, And that the fact that he DONT' want me. He is completely acting like it never happened, I know he is thinking that soon as I get the ex's money I will be buying him a car and this and thatand have nothing left to move on..
HELL NO, I am using that money to better me and my boys!! If this is how our relationship is going to be I dont want to be in it anymore,and everyday it gets worse and worse!! He does nothing to change him or us or nothing to better him or us and I cry and sleep alone in my bed...
I know there is something going on in his head or with him, but for the life of me I have no idea what it is, By saying what he did the other day about not wanting to have more kids that is why he doesn't want ot have sex was a fucking excuse for soemthing, I can tell!! Something is going on and it is making ME miserable.. I honestly don't think he could be or would cheat on me. He honestly has no time! He is never but work and home, and if he is not at one of them he is at the store getting something for the family. He never just goes out or does things alone. Not that he isn't allowed or anything..LOL He just says he would rather spend his freetime with us.. Which also says he loves us right?
Then WTF is wrong with him? Girls I am seriously concerned, NO man goes without sex, for real! So I know he is doing soemthing to ease himself..but why the hell is it not with me?
*HUGE SIGH* I am really at a loss for words on what to say about everything that is happening..err or NOT happening with my relationship...
I guess I am just destined to not have a relationship! =(
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Songs just listened to-- Blurry and She Hates Me by Puddle Of Mudd
Now listening to my playlist on my computer-- Photograph by Nickelback

OH AND Hey Nae... I was wondering if B could run by and get my magazines one day after work?

5 Comments:

Blogger Mary said...

Oh Ali-Bug, I'm so sorry things are just down right sucky!

I know you are confused and unhappy with how things are right now. From an outsiders point of view and trying to analyze what is going on, do you think that there's something physcially wrong with B and that could be the reason for his lack of intimacy? Men his age DO have 'issues' if you know what I mean. I'm not trying to give him an excuse but if it's something that's embarrasing for him, he's not going to talk about it.

Anyway, love ya girlie, if you need anything let me know!!

2:35 PM  
Blogger Nae said...

Man sorry your night sucked Ali! Feel free to call I will listen. Yes he can stop by and get them when ever. sorry I have not dropped them off to you deary. I would do it tomarrow but waiting on fridge guy and got to fax something to fix his dad's car payment and all kinds of crap. If he does not feel like stopping by tomarrow then call me tuesday I could run out and chat with ya and drop them off.

10:40 PM  
Blogger ::Ali:: said...

Thanks girls!!
I am so very very confused right now, All the time I just want to tell him that it is over and I just don't feel the same anymore, and the other times I love him so much and dont want to lose him.
I have never been more confused in my life.. I dont know what to do!

12:30 PM  
Blogger April said...

Ali, I'm so sorry things are really sucky for you right now. I know we barely know each other, but I did have a friend whose husband was sort of the same thing - it did turn out to be medical. I hope you guys get to the bottom of it and work things through. {{{HUGS}}}

3:23 PM  
Blogger JC said...

Like everyone else has said I'm so sorry you are going through this again. I was really hoping you both had worked it out. You know I'm here for ya if you ever need to talk. ((((hugs))))

10:47 AM  

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